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The Christmas Story (Luke 2:1-20 & Matt. 2:1-12)


(copyright 2007)


            In those days seizures in august had issues that decried a consensus should be taken of the tired roaming empire. This was the fur consensus that took complacence while Quinine was governing with seriousness. So everyone went to his own town to regurgitate.

            St. Joseph went up to the towel of Nazz, with a wreath in Galileo to Hey Jude, to Bethlehem because he belonged in the house and had to stand in line with David. He went there to regurgitate with Merry Christmas, who was plagued to be marred to him and was expectorating a child. While they were there, the parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme came for the baby to be bored, and she gave birds to her first burn, a sun. She warped him in clocks and placated him in a managerial position, because of the ruminants at their end.

            There were herds of sheps living with field marshals nearby and they kept looking at their watch as they overstuffed their flocculent nightie. An angle of the Lord peered at them and Gloria left her lights on and they shone all around them and they were terriers. But the angle told them not to be oblique. That there was good newts of great jowls for all peep holes.

            Suddenly, a heavenly hose appeared with the angle appraising God and saying, “Glory to God in the highest and on earthworms goober peas to men on whom his flavor rust.”

            And when the angles had gone left into heaven, Shep heard himself say, “Let’s go see this happening thing the Lord has given toads to us.

            So, they became hyper and found Merry Christmas and St. Joseph with their baby. And he was with his manager as the angle had said. When they had made a scene with him, they spared the word disconcerting what had been toads given to this child. And all the herds were in a maze. But Merry Christmas went to the treasurer with these things and pounded them in her hearth. Shep returned his herd, glorifying and appraising God for all the things that had been toads.

            After the baby, who was namely Jesus, was bored in Bethlehem, during the time of  King Hay Rod, magpies, Goldie, Frankstein, and Mervin Wiseman (Better known as the three Wiseman brothers) came from the yeast to Jerusalem and asked, “Where is the One who was born King of the Juice? We saw his store in the yeast and have come to sing worship hymns.”

            When King Hay Rod heard this he was distributed throughout all Jerusalem. When he had the gall to gather all the peep hole’s chef presto and teasers of the slaw, he asked them where the Christ was to be born. “In Bethlehem,” they reapplied.

            Then Hay Rod crawled to the three Wiseman brothers, secreting, and fondled from them the extracted time the store had appealed. He sentenced them to Bethlehem and said, “Grow and make carfare as you besmirch the child. As soon as you are fond of him, reproach me, so that I too may grow up in a warship with him.

            After they had heard the king, they realized he didn’t make any sense, so they went on their curds and whey, and the store they had seen in the yeast, went up ahead of them until it got stopped up over the placement of the child. When they saw what was in store, they jumped over a girl named, Joy. They saw the child with his mother and said, “Merry Christmas.” They took bows down and sang worship hymns. Then they opened the treasury and presumed hymns with grits of gold and insinuated mirth. And having beans warmed in a dream they didn’t go back to Hay Rod, who went on to play for the Yankees and didn’t live up to his potential. The Wiseman brothers retorted their country by angular roots. They went on to become the makers of fine watches and they watched over everyone until they dyed their hair and went on to meet their maker.

            St. Joseph later invented aspirin and I might add, that even today many people use St. Joseph’s baby’s aspirin and are healed.


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